Traveling, anywhere, an antidote to boredom or the seed for resilience. Sometimes I travel because I feel the need to be away from the epicenter. Other times, I am chased out of my comfort zone. A mode of survival, I guess.
In life's adventure, I will never be too sure who will play the most influence. Not until that formidable influence were gone forever from my embrace, only realize that after the fact. Is that a socio-psychologic effect, one of self fulfilling prophecy?
When I was a young child, I often looked at my elders with interest and distance. There were some questions in my mind that I suppressed for the longest time. But as I too become one of them, I can feel the answer settling in. Every single one of us, will always stay young at heart, despite the aging body, the ship in which we must coexist. It is a sad metaphor, but there is no such thing as aging self.
It is a typical turn of evens that over the years we normally turn to other problems that govern our lives, and as a side effect we will loose the curious child that brought us where we are. Have I lost him yet? When we realize we lost it the question remains, what will we do about that? I know I will try to seek him back every chance i have. But is that feasible? In our progressive process, a new comfortable self has long been established. That core value will not change unless, a direct threat to our existence is imminent. Anything can tip that balance. And we're never ready for it when it happens.
I often pretend to understand the intricate workings of life and death, but pretend is all I do, for I will never truly understand. Medical student or not, the basics are all out there for everyone to grasp. And yet, sometimes there are no answers to seek. Just acceptance. Can you imagine a world with no answers? I can't.
